Who are you?
I'm 21 years old. I'm going the fuck through it right now. I've been through a lot of experiences but I think the one I thought I'd probably write about the most is leaving Alcoholics Anonymous (which is a cult) after 3 years. The main story there is that I was transferred from an adolescent treatment center to an AA rehab on my 18th birthday. I am not and was not an alcoholic or addict, especially not according to AA's qualifications.
I was sexually assaulted in late May of 2025, and it's had an impact on almost every aspect of my life. It's been a couple years since I was last assaulted, and I guess I forgot how much it throws everything off balance. I've got a lot of questions about God and the meaning of everything.
Writing is and has always been my outlet for all of the things I can never say out loud. My style changes and evolves throughout the course of every post, I tend to start with trepidation and transition into something less autobiographical and more prose-esque. I write really bad poetry sometimes, nothing posted on here yet but I'm sure it'll make it onto here at some point.
I'm also gender fluid. Kinda. I suppose I'll write another post about gender at some point. I use mainly he/him pronouns, but I dabble in she/her as well. I realized that I'm a lesbian a few months ago, and found the best name for my gender is "butch." This blog is an archive of many journeys, one of them being my sexuality.
I've been through quite a few traumas and I have a few mental illness diagnoses. I guess my official stance on those is that it doesn't really matter to me what the label is for it. I'm experiencing symptoms. A diagnosis is just a simple way to tell someone I experience a certain set of symptoms. The traumas I'm sure will be referenced in other posts.
I started working as a cook a couple months ago. It's the first back of house job I've had, but not my first restaurant job. I've been working in restaurants since I was 16. I love my job, and it means a lot to me that I'm able to do what I want to do. I didn't know it when I started but it really is my dream job, at least for right now.
(Last Updated 01-05-2026)